Wedding planning is not just for the couple – it is for the parents too. The mother of the bride has a lot on her plate and takes on a lot of duties that brides may not realise. While it may not be your special day, it is a day you want to remember and enjoy with your daughter and soon-to-be son-in-law. So, if you want to be the best mother of the bride possible, follow these top tips.
Talk Money First
After the excitement of the engagement has winded down, the next step is the wedding budget. It is important to get the “money talk” out of the way long before any official planning starts. For some couples, they may assume there is no limit on their special day, which is why you not only need to take a look at how much you can afford, but discuss it thoroughly with the couple so they know what their limitations are. Also, mention how much you are willing to contribute and what you will contribute toward. Be clear about the budget so that there are no fights over money once the planning actually begins.
Remember Your Role
You may know a great photographer or have a friend who makes wedding cakes, but remember that the wedding planning is up to the couple – not you. The couple chooses who they want to cater the event, where they want to buy their dress and suit, etc. Do not take the reins on the wedding planning. Instead, be there for advice and when asked, share your opinion. By letting your daughter know you are there to support her in her planning, you can limit any tension down the road.
Pick Your Dress Wisely
There are rules with what you can and cannot wear on the wedding day. First, you must follow the style of the wedding. So, do not wear anything overly fancy if it is a casual wedding. Second, you need to get input from the bride – and of course, never wear something that takes the attention from the bride. While some modern brides don’t care if their mothers wear white, do not buy a white dress without getting the bride’s permission. While you are at it, do not pick a shade that is close to white.
Discuss the Guest List
It’s hard to not want your pick of guests at the wedding, but remember that it is not your wedding to pick the guest list for. Discuss who you would like to invite, but make sure that fits with the couples maximum guest count.
Meet the Other Parents
If you haven’t already, meet the parents of the groom and make them feel welcomed. There is nothing more stressful in a wedding than when a couple’s parents do not get along. Even if you do not see eye to eye with the other set of parents, do your best to accommodate and be kind.
Tame Your Bridezilla
If your daughter has a bridezilla-like tendency, work hard to keep it under wraps. Not only will she thank you later when she doesn’t see herself acting ridiculous in wedding videos, but you can help her have a better wedding experience just by keeping her calm.